The Increasingly Less Than Friendly Skies

Eric and I are currently en route to California to celebrate Christmas with his family. And it’s been a heckuva route. We left our cozy NYC apartment on Thursday night to bring Baxter to my parents’ house in Rhode Island for a spa week while we wing our way to lovely Shaver Lake, California, where Eric’s nature-loving parents have built the home they plan to retire to. It’s a stunning place, which I’m sure I’ll have more to say about later in the week. (Hopefully they will prove less dramatic than Thanksgiving.)

Suffice to say that with a 4 hour drive to RI on Thursday night and a 3:30 am wake up call this morning (after a giant snowstorm no less) to get to the Providence, Washington, DC, and Denver airports on time, respectively, I was thoroughly prepared for things to be less than perfect. After all, this is the Holiday Season and a three-leg flight is NEVER a good idea. But, we were leaving at 6am ET, expecting to be in Fresno, CA at 2:30 PT. No biggie. A long day, sure...but I am prepared. I am zen. I am the walrus.

Yeah. Right.

As I write this, I am sitting on the floor of the Denver International Airport. I have been sitting on this patch of floor for approximately 6 hours. I'm thinking of getting a ficus tree. And maybe recarpeting.

Oh, our flight out of snowy Providence went off without a hitch, but things in DC were not nearly as well organized (I suppose we shouldn't have been surprised by that), and we ended up missing our Fresno connection by mere minutes. Like, 7 minutes. Then, there was the hour stuck Dante's 14th level of hell (United Airlines customer service--go back and check the Inferno. It's there), after which we were FINALLY supposed to get out of lovely Colorado at 6pm MT. No go. Plane delayed. Maybe you'll see California before Christmas Eve, suckers.

Back when I was preparing to be zen about the whole travel thing, I had plans. "No problem!" I said to myself. "I'll take any extra layover time I can get to write!" you can probably imagine...that didn't happen. Instead, I read an entire romance novel on my new Kindle (OMG how I love the Kindle...but that's another post for another time), confiscated Eric's DS to play Super Mario World, and took the world's most impressive nap (during which a child nearby had uncontrollable, unmutable hiccups for 2 HOURS. Jeez! Get thee to a doctor, kid!). Not a lick of writing done. My editor (who hopefully is not reading this) would be le disappointed.

Boredom finally set in about 10 minutes ago. You are the lucky recipient of the product of that boredom. If all goes well, when next you hear from me I'll be in the snowy foothills of the Sierra Nevadas plotting to avoid actually going out INTO nature (Hazards of marrying a Californian--wilderness walks).

So...I'm thinking of you guys...may you have safe, speedy travels to wherever you're going this holiday.