Sabrina Darby's Nine Rules for Conducting an Assignation

Why not come with me on a trip down memory lane?

It's July 2009, and I'm at my first RWA conference.  Now, for those of you who have never been to RWA nationals, let's just say, these conferences are incredibly overwhelming.  When you're not squeeing because you happen to be sitting next to Stephanie Laurens or flipping out because you are *this* close to Susan Elizabeth Phillips, you're basically just trying not to look like you have no idea what you're doing.  Which, of course, you don't.

But, if you're lucky, while you're standing in the corner at a party wondering who you're going to talk to, you meet Sabrina Darby, author of the hot hot HOT On These Silken Sheets. Who, besides being awesome, is also at RWA for the first time.  And who is a kindred spirit.

Sabrina and I became fast friends, and so it's no surprise that I asked her to share a list of Nine Rules on the blog. I'm so happy that she had the time to come over to celebrate the launch of Nine Rules...!

 Nine (Annotated) Rules for conducting an assignation during “The Season.” 

1) Any potted plant or shrubbery is coverage enough for stealing a kiss––or more. Keep in mind that nearly any greenery will do, be it the thinnest fern or a whole hedge; what really matters is the intent of privacy.

2) The draperies in dimly lit alcoves are there for a purpose, make use of them. No, no, I am not recommending having an affair behind a drapery! I merely advise you that if you are trying to avoid an undesirable suitor, and hide behind a drapery to do so, you will likely stumble upon a suitor much more to your liking.

3) No matter how many people are on the terrace, there is always a corner dark enough for an embrace. This is always true. However, you must ensure that you are not seen on the way to this dark corner.

4) For even more privacy, decamp to the library. 

5) If the library is already taken, try the study. 

6) If the study is already taken, try the linen closet. A word of warning: If you are a young lady engaging in an improper embrace with a young man who has no intention of marrying ever, the library and study may seem more private but in truth are the first places any self-respecting guardian will look for you. If your intention is to force your young man’s hand, by all means continue on. If you wish to remain undiscovered for a few more chapters, then I suggest the potted plant in the corner of the ballroom. Or, if your tastes run to absolutely scandalous, I recommend seeking the anonymity of a private club catering to sexual indiscretion. Be aware that no matter how well you disguise your identity, your true love will recognize you.

7) Never underestimate the power of alcohol. If the punch at the ball is too weak, there is always a stash of brandy or whisky to be found. This bounty is usually found in the study or library. However, see the above warning with regards to privacy.

8) A billiards table has more than one purpose. If this is not immediately obvious to you, I recommend asking the man with whom you intend to meet. Any rake worth his tightly tailored trousers will know.

9) Footmen and maids can and should be bribed. Do be certain that your bribe is the highest.  

Contest time!

I've got one copy of the AMAZING On These Silken Sheets for one lucky commenter...to enter, comment with one thing that makes a heroine perfect in your view. Don't forget to leave your email address so I can reach you if you win! I'll choose the winner on Thursday morning!

And stay tuned for the rest of the month--and a dozen more Authors Rule(s) posts from an awesome range of authors! To read more of Authors Rule(s), please click here!